So.. while re-reading my blog from last night.. I realize I may have been a little harsh. I was venting... but you know.. it happens. I don't hate everyone who quotes the Dark Knight... nor anyone who thinks its the best movie ever. I just hate the general population...
That is all.
(EDIT)
I also realize that the rant makes it seem like I don't think you can be a Batman fan having only seen the movies. This is not true. I just get frustrated with what I refer to as "Teen Titans Syndrome", where one becomes infatuated with an adaptaion of a great series, and then act like they're the defacto source of information about it.
Also.. as pointed out earlier.. the rant comes off as kind of elitist with the Kubrick stuff and such.. and it shouldn't. I just don't understand why people haven't seen at least ONE Kubrick movie >.>
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Just Fucking Stop.
Now.. I know this blog was me reviewing movies. Well, it has been all of the two times I've posted in the piece of shit.. but I think I'm gonna break up my record breaking cycle with a rant. Now.. I know what you're thinking. I'm super original in my idea of ranting on a fucking blog. Well get the fuck over it. I'm gonna rant my ass off because I've about had my limit of some shit these days.. So this is my message to each and every person out there.. today and tomorrow. Maybe even yesterday. If you're reading these.. pay fucking attention.
STOP WITH THE DARK KNIGHT SHIT.
I'm sick of it. Everyone and their fucking mother is walking around town like some bad ass quoting Heath Ledger and acting like they're Bat-Fans. Guess what loyal readers, you're not! Fuck you. Just because you've seen the Dark Knight.. one of the greatest comic book movies of all time.. it doesn't make you some kind of Batman loving bad ass. I swear to god.. if I hear one more person ask me if I "Want to see a magic trick?" I'm gonna stab a goddamn pencil into my OWN EYE. You people.. are not special. You think you rock just because you've seen the 6th Batman movie twice, smarten up asshole, so has everyone else in the world. Right now there are 19 little kids in Indonesia who've seen the fucking movie twice as many times as you. Stop quoting it.. stop writing about it.. stop talking about it.. I'm gonna fucking puke.
"Oh my god.. The Dark Knight is the best movie EVER!!"
Newsflash you ape.. It's not. Now maybe.. to your minuscule fucking brain.. you believe the Dark Knight to be the best thing since sliced bread... this message is for you. First off, c'mon.. Sliced Bread has got to be the most fucking convenient food item ever. I mean.. I just grab a slice or two.. and BAM, I have like 22 meal options in that very moment. Second.. you're fucking stupid. Now.. I know it's hard to refute an opinion.. but lookie here kids.. I'm doing it. If at any point.. you think the Dark Knight is the best movie you've ever seen.. here's what you need to do.
1. Get off of your ass.
2. Read a book.. likely a pre-school book, you know.. one suitable to your intelligence level.
3. Get in your Truck.. you know, the one caked in mud with a super loud engine.
4. Drive down to your local movie rental establishment. (Not mine you hick)
5. Look for the name.. Stanley Kubrick.
6. Rent that film.
7. Watch it.. over and over again until you learn what a great fucking movie is.
See? How easy is that.. and this is only day one.
Now.. I don't want any of this to reflect in a way that puts The Dark Knight in a negative light. I loved The Dark Knight, really I did. I saw it twice in theaters.. and I wanted to go more. I talked for days with my friends about the movie.. quoting and dancing, the whole she-bang.. this was before the entire population of the world was doing the same. Even then though.. I felt it was my right as a long standing comic book fan and overall Batman lover to often speak highly of a film based on the Caped Crusader. It just.. tweeks my nipples that now, every public school retard (fuck P.C.) who's seen TWO Bats movies.. is suddenly a bloody scholar in the world of Batman. EVERYONE knows this.. or KNOWS that.. but really.. they don't know shit.
I'm sick of BATMANIA... or should I say, JOKERMANIA. That may in fact be the worst part of this whole phenomenon. When I look at my calender I dread every day that passes in the path to Halloween, because I know.. that when that day rolls around and I look out to the street... I'm going to encounter about 3.2 million fucking Jokers. This.. is really too much. The DC Universe can barely handle ONE Joker.. how the fucker am I supposed to deal with that 3.2 million times multiplied. Then again, its not like these ignorant sheep will know anything of the Joker himself. It's just gonna be a cluster fuck of painted up embarassments.. walking around talking like Christian Slater and licking their lips.. I think I'm just gonna grab Diana's Lasso and round all of these ignorant fuckers up. Maybe I'll go easy on them and just hurl them into the Ocean.. not punish them like they deserve to be punished. I'll leave that kind of agony to the Joker from Killing Joke.. a REAL fucking psycho.
And I swear to god.. if I hear one more person advocating anarchy as blowing up random buildings.. I'm gonna rape and pillage every small town from here to Brazil.
STOP WITH THE DARK KNIGHT SHIT.
I'm sick of it. Everyone and their fucking mother is walking around town like some bad ass quoting Heath Ledger and acting like they're Bat-Fans. Guess what loyal readers, you're not! Fuck you. Just because you've seen the Dark Knight.. one of the greatest comic book movies of all time.. it doesn't make you some kind of Batman loving bad ass. I swear to god.. if I hear one more person ask me if I "Want to see a magic trick?" I'm gonna stab a goddamn pencil into my OWN EYE. You people.. are not special. You think you rock just because you've seen the 6th Batman movie twice, smarten up asshole, so has everyone else in the world. Right now there are 19 little kids in Indonesia who've seen the fucking movie twice as many times as you. Stop quoting it.. stop writing about it.. stop talking about it.. I'm gonna fucking puke.
"Oh my god.. The Dark Knight is the best movie EVER!!"
Newsflash you ape.. It's not. Now maybe.. to your minuscule fucking brain.. you believe the Dark Knight to be the best thing since sliced bread... this message is for you. First off, c'mon.. Sliced Bread has got to be the most fucking convenient food item ever. I mean.. I just grab a slice or two.. and BAM, I have like 22 meal options in that very moment. Second.. you're fucking stupid. Now.. I know it's hard to refute an opinion.. but lookie here kids.. I'm doing it. If at any point.. you think the Dark Knight is the best movie you've ever seen.. here's what you need to do.
1. Get off of your ass.
2. Read a book.. likely a pre-school book, you know.. one suitable to your intelligence level.
3. Get in your Truck.. you know, the one caked in mud with a super loud engine.
4. Drive down to your local movie rental establishment. (Not mine you hick)
5. Look for the name.. Stanley Kubrick.
6. Rent that film.
7. Watch it.. over and over again until you learn what a great fucking movie is.
See? How easy is that.. and this is only day one.
Now.. I don't want any of this to reflect in a way that puts The Dark Knight in a negative light. I loved The Dark Knight, really I did. I saw it twice in theaters.. and I wanted to go more. I talked for days with my friends about the movie.. quoting and dancing, the whole she-bang.. this was before the entire population of the world was doing the same. Even then though.. I felt it was my right as a long standing comic book fan and overall Batman lover to often speak highly of a film based on the Caped Crusader. It just.. tweeks my nipples that now, every public school retard (fuck P.C.) who's seen TWO Bats movies.. is suddenly a bloody scholar in the world of Batman. EVERYONE knows this.. or KNOWS that.. but really.. they don't know shit.
I'm sick of BATMANIA... or should I say, JOKERMANIA. That may in fact be the worst part of this whole phenomenon. When I look at my calender I dread every day that passes in the path to Halloween, because I know.. that when that day rolls around and I look out to the street... I'm going to encounter about 3.2 million fucking Jokers. This.. is really too much. The DC Universe can barely handle ONE Joker.. how the fucker am I supposed to deal with that 3.2 million times multiplied. Then again, its not like these ignorant sheep will know anything of the Joker himself. It's just gonna be a cluster fuck of painted up embarassments.. walking around talking like Christian Slater and licking their lips.. I think I'm just gonna grab Diana's Lasso and round all of these ignorant fuckers up. Maybe I'll go easy on them and just hurl them into the Ocean.. not punish them like they deserve to be punished. I'll leave that kind of agony to the Joker from Killing Joke.. a REAL fucking psycho.
And I swear to god.. if I hear one more person advocating anarchy as blowing up random buildings.. I'm gonna rape and pillage every small town from here to Brazil.
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